


A (Shrimp) Cocktail for Disaster

by supersmileys (gingerninja)



Category: Suits (TV)
Genre: Comfort, F/M, Friendship, Humour, The Godawful Dinner Party, Tumblr: Suits100, slight romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-27 00:41:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12070248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingerninja/pseuds/supersmileys
Summary: Written for the for Suits100 challenge. The prompt: Describe the infamous dinner party, flying shrimp and all.





	A (Shrimp) Cocktail for Disaster

A blissfully empty Saturday lay before Harvey as he awakened, not out of necessity, but out of pure restfulness. Such a day came so rarely, that he planned to make the absolute most of it. He had plans of nothing and with no-one. He could do anything he wanted, with no restraints whatsoever (other than the inconvenience of establishment business hours). The sun was shining down on Manhattan, and by extension Harvey. There was never a more beckoning welcome to the day ahead.  
  
Harvey was feeling so optimistic with his time that the first act he made on this wonderful morning was to check his cell phone for any calls or texts that may have made their way to him over the night. A free man he was today, but not an irresponsible one. Even on such a day as this, there were on occasion issues that could swiftly change the course of his day. Most of the time, they were things that could wait until Monday, but it was important that Harvey could at least know of them so as to mentally prepare for the week ahead. His phone was remarkably clear but for a single voice message left about two hours prior by Donna.  
  
Donna wasn't the sort of person to inundate Harvey with feckless calls, especially when he had expressed to her his excitement for a quiet weekend. But at the same time, she also knew his workaholic tendencies and would often grace him with a courtesy call to help him organise any issues before he went back to work on Monday (if not before). So it wasn't out of place for Harvey to listen to her message without concern or worry for his free time. If anything, it was also pleasant to listen to her voice in almost every capacity (not that he ever planned on admitting that to her).  
  
  
"Harvey, this may sound crazy, but I'm cooking dinner tonight and I need you there. And I don't mean 'need' as in I want you to be there, there is nothing that I want less in the world than the fact that you _need_ to be there. And don't try and lie to me, I know your schedule and I know you're going to make some bullshit excuse about work. But this is a matter of _life and death_ which means that you better get your goddamn ass to my apartment by 3:30pm."  
  
If a voicemail is deleted without a response, did it ever really exist? Tempting was the idea to go back to sleep and pretend he never checked his phone. Harvey rolled over away from his bedside table - out of sight, out of mind! If it was _really_ urgent, Donna would call again to see whether Harvey got the message. Surely she didn't _actually_ mean life and death. What could be involved in cooking dinner that was so dire? She had to be exaggerating.  
  
Even if Harvey stuck to his plan-free Saturday, his conscience would be weighed down for the rest of the day wondering why Donna needed him so desperately. There was also the fact that part of Harvey was quite concerned what the consequences would be, not just for Donna, but also for him for ignoring an obvious cry for help. Whether he liked it or not, his infinite Saturday had just shrivelled in size. With a groan, Harvey picked up his phone to call her back.  
  
  
" _Why_?"  
  
"Because the consequences if you don't will be incalculable and immense." Actually hearing Donna's voice in real time made it evident that she was truly frazzled.   
  
"You're going to have to be more specific." Harvey was threatened with such consequences almost every day in his job, so something else was needed to actually threaten into action.  
  
  
"My mother has blindsided me with an impromptu visit, and if I don't cook a three course meal for her tonight then you may not have a secretary come Monday morning."  
  
"Hmph." Harvey of all people knew how much mothers could wreak havoc on people's lives. It was truly a cry for help, but the nature of the matter made him more inclined to stay far, far away.  
  
  
"And why couldn't you have asked…" Harvey paused for a moment as he tried to think of acquaintances that Donna had mentioned to him in the past. His mind came up blank. "…anyone else?"  
  
"Because she asked for you specifically." This took several more seconds to compute. He wasn't aware that Donna's mother even knew who he _was,_ let alone make a request for his presence.  
  
  
"Donna, why would she do _that_?"  
  
"I don't know, you won a case for her friend's sister's god knows what and now she wants to meet the famous Harvey Specter. You'll be worshipped and revered all evening, I promise. It'll be a boost to the ego, not that you need it." Harvey chose to ignore the little dig at his self-awareness and decided to focus on the possible positives of the night. Naturally, the quid pro quo.  
  
"What do I get in return?"  
  
"There will be lots and lots of alcohol."  This was an interesting offer. Harvey always enjoyed having a drink (or four) with Donna, and this alone would make for a good way to spend his Saturday night. At least, Harvey could rely on the fact that alcohol could ease whatever the night was to throw at him. There were fewer and fewer reasons why Harvey could feasibly turn Donna down. Not to mention the fact that it would be cruel to leave her in the lurch like this. And surely, _surely,_ Donna's company would be worth whatever her mother was like. Really, there was only one thing he could say in this situation.  
  
"Fine."  
  
" _THANK YOU._ Oh, and would you be able to pick up three pounds of shrimp?"  
  
" _What?!"_ Donna had already hung up.  
  


* * *

 

 

3 pounds seemed like a _lot_ of shrimp. Now that Harvey was staring at it in his basket, he was starting to question every single one of his choices in life that seemingly lead to this moment. He certainly wasn't intending on eating a whole pound of shrimp himself. But still, he found himself taking the shrimp to the checkout, handing over actual money for it all, and then carrying out to his car. All the while questioning what he had got himself into. Was all of this for eating, or some sort of decorative purpose? Was he about to witness some strange family ritual? He glanced down at the shrimp poking out of the paper bag on his front passenger seat. They stared back, but offered no response.  
  
The second store that Harvey found himself in was more in his comfort zone. If he armed himself with more than just the required shrimp, he could gain himself both brownie points and control over the situation.  
  
"I'm allergic to shellfish."  
  
" _Bullshit."_ Donna clearly had neither the time nor the energy for his falsities. Harvey grinned, as he could picture her glaring down the phone.  
  
"I'm at the liquor store. What kind of wine does your mom drink?" He tried to picture what Donna's mother would look like. It was difficult, as Donna scarcely mentioned her mother (that Harvey could recall). As a placeholder, he conjured up a wrinkly, grey-haired Donna. A kind lady, but a little bit over the top at times. Similar to Donna. He could imagine a household with two very creative women clashing over ideas. But Donna's tone of voice seemed to paint a picture of someone who was slightly more insufferable.  
  
  
"She doesn't drink wine, it 'gives her headaches'.  Only vodka for her. Which I have plenty of." Somehow, Harvey got the impression that there wasn't enough vodka in the world to be enough for this evening. But if Donna's mother wouldn't drink wine, that made it easier to pick something without having to worry about third party preferences. Harvey could easily work within Donna's wishes. If this could make the night even the slightest bit easier, then he was happy to go with it.  
  
"What kind of wine do _you_ drink?" He was gazing upon a shelf of all things pink and sparkling.  
  
  
"Anything. I don't care."  
  
"Something sweet it is." Harvey smiled at the sound of Donna's soft sigh over the phone.  
  
"You're a lifesaver."  
  
"Don't mention it. I'm on my way."  


* * *

 

  
Harvey had only been to Donna's apartment one other time. It felt odd to be visiting in the middle of the day instead of sneaking there in the night time. He was armed with more than just whipped cream this time, too.  
  
She practically hauled him inside and slammed the door behind him.  
  
"Do you have the shrimp?!" Harvey quickly handed the bag off to her. Even if he wasn't allergic, he was starting to develop a disliking to the creatures.  
  
"What's in the box?" she asked as she carried the food into the kitchen. Harvey examined the contents of the box he was carrying to ensure everything was in order.  
  
"Extra alcohol. We better start now." He set the box down on the table and pulled out a bottle of wine that was a pale pink colour. It was only as he pulled it out did he realise how similar it was to the seafood he had foisted off onto Donna. God, they had already gotten to him.  Donna was surprisingly enthusiastic about this suggestion. She grabbed two wine glasses, picked a random bottle and filled them both up. Her glass was almost finished before Harvey could even begin.  
  
"God, Donna, slow down!"  
  
"She's bringing her entourage - her boyfriend and her best friend, Tilly. I need to prepare." They were outnumbered, but it was okay. Harvey was confident that they would be fine. There was still a couple of hours before anyone was due to arrive, and there wasn't too much to do beforehand. Or so Harvey thought.  
  
"I brought the shrimp, everything is going to be fine. Shrimp cocktail, right? Easy."  
  
"Oh, that reminds me!" Donna dashed off to her bedroom. While she was gone, Harvey looked around the kitchen. A cookbook on the countertop was open to a cheesecake recipe. There were all sorts of vegetables and sauces covering the rest of the countertops. Harvey had not really paid much attention to her kitchen the last time he visited, but he was realising how nice it was.  
  
He turned back to his wine, and suddenly Donna stood in front of him, with a wad of bills in her hand.  
  
"For the shrimp." The amount of cash was overkill. Harvey didn't get the cheapest option for the shrimp, but he paid much less than what Donna was giving him. She was offering him bribe-level money. It was a bribe. Somehow, even this exorbitant amount of money didn't suggest to Harvey that it was wise for him to abandon ship.   
  
"That's too much."  
  
"Take it."  
  
"Donna-"  
  
"I'm serious. I know how much you were looking forward to your day off. This is the _least_ I could do to say thanks."  
  
"I can't accept this." He made no move to take the money. Donna made no move to withdraw her hand.  
  
"Consider it a retainer in case I end up getting sued."  
  
"We both know I charge more than that," he joked. Was it wrong for him to start feeling a little nervous about the evening? If the shrimp escapades weren't enough.  
  
"Harvey, I'm not kidding. _Please_ just take the goddamn money." Harvey could always return it at a later date, he figured. He begrudgingly took the cash and put it in his pocket.  
  
"We will never speak of this again." Harvey was okay with that suggestion. He didn't want to ponder the ethics of being bribed by his secretary. Except it wasn't a bribe. Definitely not. Harvey was eager to put the exchange out of his mind, and offered his help with the food preparation. To his surprise, Donna turned him down.  
  
  
Harvey had assumed that Donna had summoned him earlier so that he could help with the cooking. But, as it turned out, the real reason why she had brought him round so soon was so that he could get a full military-length briefing on how to survive an evening with Donna's mother. By the time the other guests were due, Harvey had started to feel very worried about the night ahead. Never had anyone's parent (or parents) _ever_ made him feel this nervous.  
  
The knock at the door came earlier than either of them hoped. Harvey and Donna exchanged panicked looks, and the latter jumped up to nearly run for the door. But they hadn't gone over a crucial detail.  
  
"Wait - what do I call your mom?"  
  
"If you call her Ms. O'Connor she'll probably fall over herself and write you into her will. She will insist you call her Loretta. _Don't_ fall for that. Keep calling her Ms O'Connor until she insists on her first name no less than _three_ times. If she doesn't insist three times, then she'll consider it rude."  
  
"Even though she insisted?"  
  
" _Especially_ since she insisted. It's a test."  
  
"What does she do, again?" Harvey asked desperately.  
  
"She's a teacher _." God help those poor kids. God help everyone.  
_

* * *

  
  
The former Mrs Paulsen wasn't quite the woman that Harvey was imagining. Loretta had similar facial features, but they were harsher than what Harvey was expecting. And Harvey had also been picturing something closer to red hair, but all he could think of when he looked at Loretta was Dolly Parton, if Dolly Parton was a brunette. Loretta's hair was just as big as the country singer's. Or maybe it just appeared that way because Loretta was so small. She was short and extremely thin. Usually, this might have alleviated Harvey's slight concerns about how dangerous someone could be. But this just put Harvey more on edge.  
  
Loretta squealed with delight as she greeted her daughter.  
  
"Oh my dear! Thank you for inviting us. Your apartment is much nicer than I was expecting." Donna stiffened as her mother kissed her on her cheek, but Loretta didn't seem to notice. She turned to the other guests. Tilly was almost a mirror of Loretta, except blonde. The man, however, towered over them all.   
  
"You of course know Tilly, and this is my boyfriend, Ted. We met at our homeowner's association meeting a couple of months back, and we've been absolutely _inseparable_ ever since!" There was a flair for the dramatic in Loretta's demeanour that Harvey could recognise in Donna. But he knew better than to _ever_ say that to her.  
  
"Of course," Donna muttered, rolling her eyes. Loretta caught sight of this, and took great offence.  
  
"Don't sass your mother, darling, how _rude_! Perhaps you'd better get us drinks and then introduce us to your _handsome_ friend." It was extremely difficult for Harvey to supress a shudder from the suggestive look Loretta gave him. He tried to remind himself why he was there.  
  
"This is my boss, Harvey, you asked me to invite him, _remember?"_ Now was the time for Harvey to actually speak. He stuck his hand out to shake hers, despite his gut instinct telling him to not touch in any way if possible.  
  
"Ms O'Connor, lovely to meet you. I'm Harvey Specter."  
  
"Oh, call me Loretta, sweetheart, everybody does." He would, only if the circumstances allowed for it. Harvey wasn't planning on making any mistakes. Or, rather, any _more_ mistakes.  
  
"Oh yes, you put my sister in jail!" Tilly shrieked, and Harvey's blood ran cold. So did Donna's, by the look on her face. That wasn't what Donna had described to him, and he wasn't so sure he would have said yes if he'd known the truth about why Loretta's friend knew of him.   
  
"I did _what?!"_ The two older women burst into a laughter that raised Harvey's hackles. He felt as though he had walked into a trap. He wanted to go back in time to that morning, climb into bed, and ignore Donna's message. His time at the DA's office had not ended on the best of terms, and to learn that he was in the company of an opponent's family was less than desirable.  
  
"Oh, don't worry, she was a complete _criminal,_ we were all so glad you did!" Somehow, Harvey wasn't comforted by this. He was beginning to fully empathise with the urgency in Donna's earlier message. But at least he hadn't angered Tilly or Loretta by his past actions, so that was a good start. He was after all there to help Donna, not make the evening worse. But it sure as hell was going to be difficult.  


* * *

  
  
It didn't take long into the appetisers before Donna's limit was apparently hit.  
  
  
"When are you going to give me grandchildren, Donna?" Harvey nearly choked on his shrimp; they had fielded off questions about the possibility of a relationship with relative ease. Loretta seemed to adopt the idea that Donna wouldn't be good enough to date Harvey anyway, and that had nearly caused drinks to go flying. But this was a whole new level.  
  
"For all you know, I could be barren," Donna said irritably. Tilly looked utterly appalled at such an assertion. Ted, like he had done so all evening, seemed completely nonplussed by any of this conversation. He had barely said a word all night.  
  
"Don't be ridiculous sweetheart, we're Irish. We're meant to have big hearty families."  
  
"You only had one child, Mother," Donna pointed out, her voice so saccharine it almost made Harvey's teeth hurt. The sweetness Harvey recognised as a danger sign.  
  
"Yes, darling, and often I wonder whether my life would have been happier with more children. I was really hoping for a son when you were born. Such a shame." Harvey had had enough tumultuous dinners to know that it was about a few seconds away from launching into fisticuffs.  
  
  
"Donna, can you point me to your bathroom?" He hoped that his stare was meaningful enough that Donna would get his hint to hightail it out of there.  
  
"Yes. Let me find you the guest towels." Her theatre training  kicked in and she was wise enough to seize the immediate opportunity Harvey was offering.  
  
  
 Donna practically threw down her food on the table and walked to her bedroom so quickly that Harvey almost had trouble keeping up with her. She plopped down onto her bed, head in hands.  
  
"I can't do this. I want to _strangle_ her." Harvey sat down next to her. He didn't know quite how to respond to that, as the feeling was mutual, so he tried to offer a solution instead.  
  
"I can call in a work emergency if you want?" He knew there'd be no way Loretta would be able to say no to him, especially when he had already made Tilly's dream come true.  
  
  
"No, I better face this." Her gloomy gaze over to the door said otherwise.  
  
"Donna, you know she's delusional, right?" Donna sighed heavily.  
  
"Yeah. I guess. Maybe if I get dinner on quickly, they can leave sooner." A slightly more optimistic Donna was an encouraging Donna. They could definitely get through this. 

* * *

  
  
  
"Charades! While Donna gets dinner ready, we should play some charades!" There was no chance that Harvey was going to be able to handle this chapter of the evening without significantly more alcohol. He quickly ducked into the kitchen and opened up wine bottle number two. Donna gave him a grateful look as Harvey topped up her glass next to the stove she was cooking at. Just as he was about to return to the living room, another piece of shrimp in his mouth (the three pounds were disappearing remarkably quickly), Donna quietly called his name.  
  
"Hey, Harvey - guess who I am?" She roughed up her hair and puckered her lips, strutting a little across the kitchen. It was an incredible impersonation of Loretta, and as she danced across the kitchen, glass in hand, Harvey couldn't contain his laughter.  
  
"HAH!"  
  
It was quite an emphatic laugh. The shrimp in his mouth flew across the room, in the direction of Loretta's hair. Wait, not the direction of her hair. The shrimp was _in_ Loretta's hair. It didn't half-heartedly attach itself to then fall off, no, it was firmly wedged in there.  Harvey stared at it. He locked eyes with the dead crustacean. It did not cower under his gaze. It was though time itself had stopped from the sheer improbability of the situation. Harvey had never been able to send a projectile from his mouth that far in his life (although he definitely had never tried it, especially not one evening when he and his Harvard classmates were a little inebriated). But of all nights, _on this very night,_ he was able to send a shrimp flying halfway across the room and _into Donna's mother's hair._ Without even trying. Harvey tried to figure out what he did in a past life that could have led to him being punished in this way.  
  
  
"Is something wrong, Harvey?" Tilly asked. She had noticed the sudden shift from Harvey's laughter to his look of horror.  
  
"No, I was just admiring Loretta's hairstyle. Not many women could pull it off." Fewer still could pull off the shellfish lodged in their locks look.  
  
Loretta looked absolutely delighted at this compliment. She put a hand to her hair - _centimetres_ away from touching the unwanted intruder. Donna had not taken her eyes off her mother's head; Harvey was certain that she hadn't taken a breath ever since she noticed. She looked as though her life was flashing before her eyes. She was at risk of burning the meal if she didn't turn back to the stovetop.  
  
"Why, _thank_ you, Harvey! Glad to see _someone_ appreciates the effort I put into my appearance on a daily basis." Donna wasn't the only subject of Loretta's glares this time; Ted copped his fair share. He rolled his eyes in response once Loretta had turned her attention back to Harvey. It was the first instance of personality that Harvey had witnessed in the man all evening. The second instance was when Ted's eyes flickered to Loretta's hair and spotted the shrimp. He started coughing, nearly choking on his own shrimp as he stifled his laughter.  
  
"Chew your food properly, darling."  
  
"I need a cigarette," Ted said gruffly. He looked to Harvey. "Come on, son, we'll let the ladies talk." Harvey didn't particularly want to leave Donna in the room with Tilly and Loretta without any witnesses. If the shrimp was discovered before any attempt was made to remove it, the world as they knew it was likely to end. It was the first time that Harvey believed Donna's initial claim that lives would be at stake. He had to think fast. He inched over to the couch where Loretta was sitting so he was standing right behind her.  
  
"Loretta, why don't you let me fill up your glass before I step outside?"  
  
"Thank you Harvey, you're quite the gentleman, aren't you?" She turned away and quickly Harvey reached out to grab at his sworn enemy.  
  
_It was free!_ The amount of product in Loretta's hair was evidently enough to single-handedly destroy all the rainforests, because she didn't even notice Harvey yanking the shrimp from her hair. It was the least he could do, leaving Donna alone with two of the most intimidating women Harvey had ever come across. As he went into the kitchen to refill Loretta's drink, he gave Donna's arm a sympathetic squeeze.  
  
"Hurry back," she muttered. He nodded firmly. Making his way back to the couch, he realised that his legs were feeling rather weak. It was either the alcohol or it was the terror of the situation that had just transpired. Probably both. At any rate, he had secured his place in Loretta's good books and was free to accompany Ted outside for a few minutes without physical injury.   
  
"We'll do the charades when you get back!" It was meant as a promise, but Harvey knew to take it for what it really was: a threat. He followed Ted all the way out of the apartment, down the stairs and onto the sidewalk on the street. For a second Harvey thought that Ted was bailing and taking Harvey with him, but Ted stepped over to the wall of the building and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. He offered one to Harvey who accepted; Harvey wasn't a regular smoker, but the stress of the evening made it extremely tempting. One wouldn't hurt.  
  
  
"Did you get it?" Ted asked, lighting up. Harvey unfurled his fist to reveal the shrimp. He couldn't let it go; he almost wanted to keep it as a trophy of such a ridiculous occurrence. Ted nodded approvingly.  
  
"Good. She's too hard on the poor girl." This was news to Harvey. All that Ted had done that evening (AKA absolutely nothing) had suggested that he was complicit in Loretta's behaviour towards her daughter. It angered Harvey that someone supposedly so revered in his community would fail to stand up for such blatant injustice.  
  
"Then _why -"  
  
_ "Love is complicated." Harvey turned away from Ted to face the street. He didn't like this answer; it was something his _own_ mother would have said to justify all the terrible things she did. He lit up his cigarette as a way to excuse his lack of response. Ted was talking complete bullshit, and there was no way that any form of disagreement from Harvey's end would go down well. The absolute best he could do was a silent agreement to disagree with Ted. Ted, however, seemed to pick up on Harvey's sentiment.  
  
"Boy, you worked for the DA. You're used to seeing the worst in people."  
  
"And you're so clouded by what you call 'love' that you're willing to let others be hurt," Harvey shot back. "Donna did nothing and yet you're okay with seeing her treated this way?! You're full of shit!"  
  
When Ted took a few seconds to respond, Harvey realised he may have gone too far. But to Ted's credit, he kept his calm.  
  
"I'll agree with you if you can say that to Loretta." Ted wasn't the person that Harvey was truly angry at. But lashing out at Ted and doing the same to Donna's mother were two different things. Donna had explicitly asked him to stay calm around her, Harvey didn't want to go against her wishes and cause more drama. But was that _really_ what Donna wanted? It occurred to Harvey that he didn't even know. And that he probably _should_ have known, had he taken more interest in Donna's life. After all, she knew basically everything about his. She was Donna, for God's sake. Of course she did.  
  
"Maybe we better get back," Harvey suggested, calling a truce on the conversation. Ted nodded in agreement, and the smouldering remains of their cigarettes and disagreement were left on the sidewalk.  
  
  
"Do you know what the main course is?" Ted asked as they ascended the stairs back to Donna's apartment.  
  
"More shrimp," Harvey said, because he knew Ted wouldn't like it.   
  
"Hmph."  
  
 

* * *

 

 

Upon returning to the apartment, Ted and Harvey found Tilly and Loretta almost beside themselves with laughter over the charades game they had commenced. Donna, meanwhile had finished at the stove and was sitting at the table, completely zoned out. Tilly and Loretta were so involved in their game that they didn't even notice that Ted and Harvey had returned. Ted settled into an armchair, and Harvey joined Donna at the table.  
  
"You okay?"  
  
"The main course has been overruled, and now they're going to play charades until Mom decides that it's time for the cheesecake." Harvey glanced up at Tilly, who was doing a very enthusiastic rendition of _Rocky_ (complete with singing the theme song). Part of him wanted to point out that charades usually involved silence, but he figured it was imprudent to draw attention to himself when he and Donna had a strange moment of invisibility.  
  
  
  
"Oooh! _OOOOH!_ Is it - no, wait, I've got this - is it _Chariots of Fire_?" Loretta's lack of film knowledge was bordering on criminal. It physically pained Harvey to see her miss out on one of the best movies of all time.  
  
" _No,_ you silly woman - it's _Rocky_!" Tilly shrieked, doubling over in laughter. At least one of them had the semblance of brains.  
  
" _You're supposed to let me guess!"_ Loretta squealed back. The pair of them sounded like 14 year old girls. Ted, somehow, could sit in the living room with his eyes closed and block it all out.  
  
  
Donna, still in a zombie-like state, got up from the table and went to the kitchen. Harvey was about to follow her to ensure she didn't engage in anything dangerous, but instead she pulled out two dinner plates and heaped some of the seafood pasta onto them for herself and Harvey. When she brought them over, Harvey took a turn to stand up.  
  
"I'll bring us more wine."  
  
Ignoring the antics of the two women in the living room (who seemed to have forgotten anyone else existed), Harvey and Donna ended up having an oddly pleasant dinner. For over an hour, they were uninterrupted. Ted had fallen asleep (Harvey assumed) while Tilly and Loretta got drunker and more sloppy with their game of charades. They ate in silence, making for one of the strangest meals Harvey had ever had. His aversion to shrimp seemed to have disappeared now that he had wrestled one from Loretta's hair. Things were looking up.  
  
  
But alas, it wasn't to last. Tilly and Loretta, rather sloshed at this point, had decided that it was time for cheesecake. Unfortunately for them, there was only a small amount left. Harvey and Donna had done their best to make sure that they would leave as quickly as possible. It had nothing to do with the fact that the cheesecake was delicious and that Harvey and Donna were rather hungry.  
  
  
"You didn't make enough to feed your guests?" Alcohol only made Loretta's voice higher-pitched and even more intolerable. Harvey had had enough of Loretta blaming Donna for things all evening, and he stood, about to put Loretta in her place - but Donna got there first.  
  
"I only made enough for _one_ guest, Mom. You can't just invite more people without asking me first and expect that there would be enough food! You can take what I give you, or you can get the hell out!"  
  
Harvey could have sworn that Loretta's eyes nearly bulged out of her head. But before she could scream in response (and Harvey could see how easily it was about to turn into a shouting match), Tilly sniffed and placed a hand on Loretta's arm.  
  
"Maybe we'd better go. I can see we're no longer wanted." Loretta did not take the hint to step away from confrontation. She stepped towards the table, her hair big and looming over her seething face. Her eyes had a deranged expression on  
  
"How _dare_ you treat us this way! I gave birth to you, and this is how you treat me?!"  
  
"The bare minimum!" Donna shouted back. Loretta took another step towards her daughter, and Harvey moved so he stood between the two women. It was about to get violent, and Harvey didn't want Donna to get hurt.  
  
" _Alright, we're leaving!"_ Ted's voice boomed across the apartment. Everyone halted in their tracks, surprised.  
  
"Loretta, you've had too much to drink. We're going before you end up making a fool out of yourself." The man had balls after all.  
  
"Well, if you say so." And just like that, Loretta was back to her calm, haughty self. The switch was eerie. She swooped back to the living room to collect her coat and purse. The three departing guests didn't even look back as they made for the door. Harvey knew he had one last chance. He picked up a leftover piece of shrimp and hurled it across the room, aiming for Loretta's head. It missed and hit the wall. They didn't notice as they slammed the door shut behind them. But Donna, on the other hand, had a huge look of admiration on her face.  
  
"That's the second nicest thing anyone has ever done for me." Harvey was about to pat himself on the back when he realised what she had said.  
  
"Wait, what's the nicest thing?"  
  
"If you get me some more alcohol this very second it will be the nicest thing." Who was Harvey to say no, really?  


* * *

 

 

"That was…awful." Donna slowly walked into the scene of the crime and found a seat. She still seemed a little shell-shocked from the evening, and Harvey could hardly blame her.  
  
" _God_ awful." Harvey handed her a glass of scotch and sat down beside her. She took it without even looking up, her eyes still staring into space. The shrimp was the forefront of both their minds. But after a few seconds, Donna snapped out of it and took a sip, relaxing for the first time all day. She settled back onto the couch and closed her eyes contentedly.  The silence eased into a more soothing one, nothing but the very faint sounds of the city in the background.  
  
  
"I'm sorry for tonight."  
  
"You're _sorry?!_ " Donna's apology just made Harvey want to call Loretta back and give her a piece of his mind. He had been too cowardly to do so before, but now that Loretta had gone and Harvey was onto the whiskey part of the evening, he was ready to fight. Standing in between her and Donna wasn't quite enough.  
  
"I should have given you more warning about what she's like."  
  
  
"Donna, there's no amount of warning that could have prepared me for her. Don't apologise." Donna looked like she wanted to challenge Harvey on that thought, but thought better of it and changed the subject.  
  
"Oh my God, that shrimp in her hair." The memory would forever be etched into Harvey's mind.  
  
"I've never been more scared for my life."  
  
"Neither," Donna laughed. Her laughing continued, getting more and more uncontrollable until finally came the tears. Long deserved, hopeless tears. Harvey felt paralyzed as he watched her cry - would it be too much for him to hug her? Then he realised that that was a stupid thought as he remembered the last time he had been in Donna's apartment. A hug wasn't close to being enough.  
  
"Donna, it's okay," he murmured. Harvey would have to settle with enveloping her in a hug. It wouldn't take away the pain she'd endured her whole childhood, but it was hopefully enough to let her feel safe in crying in front of him. The alcohol probably helped in giving her the courage to do so; Harvey had rarely seen her so vulnerable around him.  
  
"No, it's not. I ruined your weekend."  
  
"You didn't do that, your mom did. _You_ cooked a great dinner, put up with some serious bullshit and lived to tell the tale."  
  
It took a couple of minutes for Donna's sobs to subside, and a few more for Harvey to let go of her. Those few minutes were some of the most peaceful Harvey had ever experienced. He was extremely reluctant to release her; it was Donna who eventually pulled away.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"You're welcome. But you know I'm never coming back here again, though, right?" Donna laughed again, this time free from tears. She picked up her glass from the coffee table again. Harvey followed suit, knowing that things were closer to normal. Donna shook her head in disbelief.  
  
"Harvey, I'd be surprised if I'd want to live here still, too."  
  
"I'm sure you have some _good_ memories of this place."  
  
"I can think of at least one," Donna replied. She smiled at Harvey, and looked away blushing when she realised what she had said. The opportunity was there for Harvey to make a bold move. But something was holding him back. Maybe he wasn't  brave enough today. Maybe it wasn't the right time. Or the place. Harvey had wanted to make the absolute most of his Saturday, but there'd be other Saturdays. Hopefully some of them would be spent with Donna.  
  
"How about I cook you dinner next weekend at my place?" That way, Harvey would have more control. And more scotch.  
  
"As long as there's no shrimp, I'm in." There'd be another time. Harvey was sure of it.  

 


End file.
